Lei Yu

Hello my lovely readers. It’s beginning of May so that means an update from the month of April.

School, perfectionism, burn out, rest, the season ahead

The first half of April was one of the worst time for me so far in 2025. My final term paper for the course from seminary has put my life off balance. I put too much pressure on myself for the paper. Perfectionism got the best of me and I pushed all my other responsibilities until after my paper is done. But I also procrastinated by escaping to video games and doom scrolling, so the time I could have used to work on my other obligation was used on video games and doom scrolling. All while being anxious about writing that paper. Work was also busy during that time so I ended up burnt out. I realized this about a week into April. So I was able to regroup and focus on finish the paper. Letting go of the idea that the paper has to be perfect. It just have to be done. If I have extra time I will edit and improve it.

This made me realize that I need to take a break for the summer and rethink how I want to approach seminary. What happened last month was extremely unhealthy. I can’t live like this if this happens every time I have to write a paper. My devotionals also started falling off the rails during that time. Things have to change. God has been speaking to me about prayer since beginning of this year, so I know that He wants me to develop a habit of prayer. Prayer will remind me to do things through His strength and not my own. So I’m aiming build up a habit to spend 1 hour praying every day by September before my next semester begins.¹

There is also many other obligations that I haven’t spent time on because of school. The break is really just a break from school, because I will be spending time working on other things. But a break from being evaluated is a big break for me.

Week of Easter

After my course is finished Easter comes along. It is a perfect time to do a fast, and start off building my habit to pray. I started my fast on April 15 Tuesday and I aim to end my fast on April 18 Friday. And let me tell you this week was full of surprises. During this week I was able to see God working a lot in my life. My mother has been inviting my father to go to my church’s Tuesday service and he’s been going for a few times now. And this week when he came back home he wanted to download the bible app on his phone. I was leaping for joy in my heart. God is working in people’s heart even when I don’t. I also had my very own Gideon’s fleece moment. God already made something clear to me earlier this year. But foolish me, still having reservations. God decided to give me something even clearer. During this week, God also through my mentor taught me how to be a leader for a short term mission team. I was very thankful for that because I’ve been pretty uneasy about how to lead my team but talking to my mentor really help a lot.

Other

Everyone’s Going to Japan

On April 28 I went to Missionary Fellowship at the OMF Guest House, found out a lot of people are also looking at Japan as a mission field. God is doing something in Japan. And just a week before my mission trip to Japan, I learned that one of my cousin just went to Japan, and one of my friend also just went to Japan. Everyone is going there.

Food

Tried out Shawarma Land I have heard a lot of good things from this establishment. It was quickly lively and busy when I got there at 6pm on a Friday. Tried the Chicken Shawarma, it was okay. I still like Osmows Shawarma better. 3/5. Next time I will try their poutine.

Shopping

I found the current bag I’m using is a bit overkill for my daily use. So I went on a trip to Decathlon to look for this bag. I learned that using something that’s dirt cheap and still does the job, brings me so much joy than buying something expensive with all the features.

Losing Weight

I have gained about 20lb since the start of COVID. I am planning to lose weight this season. Starting by changing my eating habits to eat less carbs and to walk more (10k+ a day).

Books

This month I read the book Tactics by Gregory Koukl.

Saw a tortoise on Apr 29th!